There are seven reflections that remain with me of the year 2018 ! It was not just a year of 365 days. It was the year when I turned seventy! It was a year when I wondered whether I was swimming against the current and losing the will to continue! It was also a year, when the contemplative vision for life returned to me to show me the way!
1. Stressful experiences. Following the decision in November 2017, to relinquish my responsibilities in an organisation where I was in a responsible position, the year 2018 began with a sense of 'being left alone'! Some friends with whom I have had a lot to do for four years distanced themselves from me! I was made to feel responsible for the turmoil in the organisation while those whose acts of commission and omission created the disorder succeeded in exonerating themselves. It seemed unfair. I was overwhelmed by sorrow for inviting this on myself, but gradually found my way to discover the life lesson concealed in the distress- life is a journey and the way marks of that journey are peeks and valleys, both of which are formative and creative! The immediate outcome of this experience was two initiatives: to write letters of gratitude to all those who have touched my life since my medical student days and commence on my biographical sketching, both of which have restored the inner composure and brought joyful recollections! In a series of ten letters I was able to recall 25 years of association with Dr Frank Garlick, which Dr Garlick received with appreciation. It was truly a celebration of our association with each other from 1972, which led to the formation of the Evangelical Medical Fellowship of India in 1978.
2. Family times. Arpit and Amy and their three children, Ethan, Ezra and Esther spent three months with us on two different occasions. It brought us closer to them and gave us an isight about their choices and sense of direction in life. Anandit and Aswathy along with Thea have also moved on in pursuing their calling. Both families seem to discover a mission through what they do. Anna and I have made time for each other through our times of reading and reflections. Our home is becoming place of rest and renewal. We find new ways of connecting with our friends and colleagues. There were meaningful interactive times with foster students and few others, which have enlarged our lives and made us feel connected with others beyond the usual social relationships.
3. Storm and flood. It was one year since we came to live in our cottage, when we experienced the fury of nature. We lost trees, and walls around the property broke down, the TV, watching machine, wireless modem, refrigerator, invertor, etc got damaged when the lightning struck. Our neighbourhood and almost the whole state of Kerala went through a devastating experience with loss of property during the flood in August, 2018. We are still rebuilding the wall and recovering from the damages caused by the rain and storm. There is some respite from the perennial leak from the canal, which used to flood the property almost all the year whenever there was heavy rain. The repair work we initiated seems to help at least for now. It is more than just coincidence that the external adverse circumstances came upon us at the same time when we were emotionally overtaken by the turmoil with the organisation with which I was associated for five years. It is a great relief that we were enabled and guided through this season of considerable turbulence.
4. Transition planning. I have had a growing sense during the year that I need to close my current profile of professional involvement with the MOSC Medical College. A new team of professionals is now in place in the department at MOSC Medical college. The new initiatives of conducting clinical meetings fortnightly, research projects, partnership planning with a local school to start a resource facility for children who need learning support, commencing the activities of the Learning Resource Centre, etc have brought a new ambience of looking forward to the future to make contribution for helping families and children. It is the sixth year since the developmental paediatrics and child neurology department was started at MOSC Medical College. I look forward to the seventh year as a transition for the new leadership to take full responsibility. For Anna, it was a year when she handed over her responsibility of research co-ordination to a colleague, although she still guides a few students for the ICMR research projects. This freed her to give more time to establish a museum in the Pharmacology department and redesign the practical classes with hands on experiences in injection, starting IV lines, etc. Now she is immersed in preparing a new practical record for students. It is her second year as the head of the department of Pharmacology. With the new leadership in MOSC medical college, a lot has changed. The medical students now wear a uniform !
5. Teaching and learning involvements. Anna has been active in making her teaching responsibilities more innovative and there is a good response for all that she has initiated. I cannot feel the same in my involvement with students. I am still struggling with an orientation many students carry with them to 'pass the examination' somehow rather than view their experience as a 'preparation to become doctors'. This is a disturbing trend as students need to prepare themselves for a post graduate entrance test at the end of internship, the curriculum of which is placed well above their present level of knowledge base. I have often wondered whether the teachers and students have sufficient informal contacts with each other for students to experience the vocation of practice of medicine. It looks like that the majority of students go through the medical course but not feel integrated into becoming doctors with a mission! Most of the conversations with students when we meet with them in our foster group has been on the theme, 'Calling of a doctor'!
6. Thirty-five years of ASHIRVAD. The year 2018 was special year because Anna and I felt deeply grateful for the joy of seeing the fruits of ASHIRVAD in the way child development activities we initiated at Chennai, Nagpur, Vellore, and Kolenchery have brought some respite for families and support for children. We designed a table calendar for 2019, 'Garden visitors' and sent to friends of ASHIRVAD who have been associated with us for the last thirty-five years. The Friends of ASHIRVAD in Berlin, under the leadership of Gisela Jahner has been most supportive and liberal in their giving over the years. ASHIRVAD is a 'philosophy of caring and sharing' by 'taking sides' of children who are developmentally disadvantaged. It has been a life time exploration for us. We feel grateful that it did make a difference in the lives of many children. We remember many who made special contributions to this initiative- the BMMF international which supported us till 1997, Ms Katharine Makower who wrote the book, 'Beginnings' to summarise the story of ASHIRVAD from 1983 to 1997, publication of the book 'Parenting your child', invitation from CMC Vellore in 1997 to enter into a Memorandum of Understanding with CMC Vellore to start the Developmental Paediatrics Unit at CMC....!
7. Life is for Living, Learning and Listening. This is becoming our calling in a tangible way. It is bringing a greater appreciation of the contemplative view of life. The inner takes precedence over the external. It is in the interior of our lives, there are treasures! The treasures are for others. We feel called to sow seeds of hope and trust in our relationships. These insights stay with us as we recollect 2018. The listening habit brings revision of lives and gives a new orientation to live and serve!
So farewell, 2018.
It was a formative year!
It was also a transforming year!
M.C.Mathew(text and poto)
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