17 September, 2018

Memories and example!


This is a chilli plant my mother planted perhaps about ten years ago! It still gives its yield through out the year. It is on the walkway leading to our cottage and therefore it brings back several memories every time I walk pass this plant. My mother usually preferred to use the vegetables grown in her garden, which she got organised with the help of the domestic helper. 

I remember her as a teacher committed to her profession in an admirable way. Half way through her teaching career she went for a year's course on advancing her skills in play-way method of teaching children in the middle school. In the early sixties, the Montessori form of education had just been introduced in the country. She felt that method to be a better way of helping children learn than the conventional approach of teaching with 'Chalk and black board'! During her training, she was allowed to submit her project work in her own handwriting instead of being typed, in view of her commendable handwriting. I was told by my teachers to 'follow the style' of my mother's handwriting. I remember this because, we used to have handwriting competitions at school. On  a few occasions, I received prizes for good handwriting. 

I remember Anna for her habit of writing. She too has a legible and well formed handwriting. During our courtship of one year what sustained us was letters that we wrote to each other. The late seventies in India was still without an easy access to telephones or e-mails. We depended on the postal system which usually delivered letters on the third or fourth day. Anna was at CMC Vellore and I was at Medical College, Nagpur. Our letters formed our understanding and aspirations for our life together.  Both of us preserved those letters and consider them as formative in our early relationship. The handwritten letters are infrequent now-a-days. The inland, which the postal department produced, was frequently used as it gave three pages to write.

What is special about a hand written letter! I feel that it carries a personal touch! 

Recently I came across a handwritten message from late Dr L B Joseph, a former director of CMC, Vellore, written in  six page letter he had typed himself, about six months before his home call. I got to know him from the time I was in the CMC governing Council in 1984. It was coincidental. Dr Joseph was keen to have a policy for CMC Vellore on the Medical Termination of pregnancy, for which the council constituted a three member committee. I was a member along with Dr K.C.Mmmen and Dr. V.I.Mathen. I was inducted to this committee because of the book I had written, 'Let me live-an alternative to abortion'! Dr Joseph appreciated my efforts to present a Biblical view on the value and sanctity of life. Since then, Dr Joseph on several occasions reached out to me even after he retired from CMC.

One such occasion was when there was a controversy on the admission for the undergraduates in 2006, when the sponsorship of students by the churches was replaced by a selection process based on merit alone due to a pressure from the state government! Dr Joseph was deeply disturbed by this and questioned it in the local court. His petition was dismissed. I met him on the morning when he was getting ready to approach the high court. Following an hour long conversation he deferred going to the court and requested me to speak to his lawyer about dropping the petition to appeal in the high court. His readiness to explore other options was magnanimous. The CMC council appointed a committee to look into the matter and gave recommendations to prevent such things from happening. It was found out later that CMC had already legal protection to proceed with its own admission policy, which was overlooked or not known to the administration!

In the message he wrote to me in that typed letter, he shared some thoughts about his concerns about the need to find some revised approach to the governance of CMC Vellore. His thoughts were profound and practical. When I was invited to chair the governing council, although I refused for a year or so, among other pressures to reconsider, one inspiring thought that came to me about accepting it was this handwritten message form Dr Jospeh to think about the future of CMC and its governance. Although, I initiated some discussion on the governance of the institution internally with the faculty and administration, it is after my term in the council s its chairman, a committee is being constituted to look into the governance in view of its diversification, multiple campuses, increase in the staff strength, new regulatory requirements, imposed change in admission policy for the undergraduate and post-gradaute courses, etc.  

Dr Joseph was an example of an honourable leader. During his term in the office as a two term director, there was as strike by the hospital employees against disciplinary action taken towards some erring staff. The strike divided the community and there was declining trust and mutuality within the community. He got the then chaplain, Rev A.C.Oommen along with Dr P. Zachariah to find a way forward in bringing reconciliation. Along with this, Dr Joseph also showed considerable openness to dialogue with those who were offended in any way! 

I remember many occasions of visiting him and listening to inspring stories and of those his wife. I felt honoured the way they trusted me with their personal stories of family life. They were both musicians with profound interest in western classicals. One privilege, I had, which according to them was offered only to few visitors, was listening to them play the piano for me. They lavished their affection on me and I feel grateful. I feel regretful that I was not able to attend their funerals. However, I did have an ppportunity to meet them when they were ailing!

However the last occasion when I visited Dr Joseph was few weeks before his home call. He was admitted to the hospital a few times during recurrent illnesses. He had by then decided to stay at home, with his son in the RUHSA campus and take only palliative care. That was an occasion when we had a long time to relive many happy occasions of fellowship times spread over 25 years. His faith and hope in a loving God was radiant. He spoke of his late wife most affectionately and recollected each member of his family with loving admiration. We recalled common friends. During that two hour meeting, Dr Joseph conveyed the pilgrim spirit of ‘going home, when called’. He invited me to pray and that indeed turned out to be a solemn occasion for both of us. His loving handshake looking into my eyes, saying, ‘MC, you have been a faithful friend and a companion’ resonate in  my heart. A close friend of Dr Joseph, Dr Jayabalan,who was a regular visitor of Dr Joseph told me recently that Dr Joseph referred to me  as a ‘trusted friend, who lived my calling mindful of others’! That was a blessing to my soul. I remember receiving two books authored by Dr Joseph during my last visit to him.


That is how the faculty and staff retreats began as a means of upbuilding the CMC community. Every director during his or her term in the office normally asked the chaplaincy department to organise retreats for the faculty to refresh the faculty with the values and ethos of the institution! I was privileged to attend the retreat series led by Re. Dr Valsan Thampu, organised by Dr V.I.Mathen, during his term as the director. Anna and I had joined CMC in 1997. This experience helped us to integrate into the life of the institution. It was this experience which helped me to be available to organise the retreats when two directors, Dr George Chandy and Dr. Sunil Chandy requested me to do so. Dr Suranjan Bhattacharji, during his term as the director organised retreats for the faculty and post graduate students with the help pf Dr. George Mathew, the principal at that time. I was also requested to be involved to help, but could not do so as it was close to my retirement from the faculty of CMC.  

Our lives are pages of history and memories. There are some whose examples inspire us. To live gratefully and gracefully is our calling!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)




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