I left for work a few days ago, after sighting the banana plant flowering! After planting five months ago, most of the banana trees have flowered by now.
On my way to work, I noticed the paddy field ready for harvest.
When I passed by that field, I noticed that the paddy was harvested and taken away. The workmen were seen waiting for the machine to roll the straw for transporting to feed the animals.
The two sights- the banana flowering and the paddy yielding rice and straw!
Both grew to be what hey are now, because they were planted and cared for!
This has been a message that has often come to me in the recent months. Many families whom I meet for the developmental needs of their children grow up because they are cared for, for addressing their special needs.
It takes a life time for many children to convert the input offered to their advantage!
Most children I welcome make some developmental progress. Some children are stable although do not make incremental progress.
But some children show decline or regression in their development. This experience is devastating for some families.
Recently a couple with their five yers old daughter came to share the regression in her neurological development. Normally residents in the USA, the family went through a rigorous diagnostic and therapeutic process before the diagnosis of Rett Disorder was announced to them a year ago. That girl lost some more of her abilities since then.
It was a dilemma to continue the conversation when I found the parents choking and struggling to share their sorrow.
Then I realised that, it was a time when they needed to be heard and received! At the end of a long conversation, where I was largely a listening companion, one confession from parents gave away the reason for their composure and fortitude. The Mother said, 'We are better parents now and have found in each other the support we need at a time such as this'. They were discovering a new dimension in their married life and sensing a mission of being parents to their daughter, who would have more challenges ahead!
It was after this meeting with parents, who touched me by their self giving character, I noticed the rice fields harvested and the grains already transported to the barn. It is a rewarding experiencing for a farmer.
There are many parents who would not have the joy of their children fulfilling their aspirations, because they are developmentally challenged!
The parenting vocation in such situations can become burdensome!
This couple that I referred to above, came to meet me because they heard that I have long years of involvement with developmentally challenged children! At the end of the meeting, they left with me a message of how a family can stay encouraged weathering a storm in their daily life and that too with thought and care! Th silence I offered for their narration was what they needed!
The fruits of labour can bring a different outcome than our expectations! In this case, the parents live with a calling to be attentive to their daughter! They are love-giving! That sums up their view of parenting!
To love a child without any expectations in return is a noble calling in parenting!
M.C.Mathew(text and photo)
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