A flower has no choice !

A flower remains open. It has a few possibilities once open. It can remain open till its petals whiter adn fall off. It can open and close like the butter cups do and live for a few days. It invites nectar seekers like in the three photographs above. Some flowers are cut to be kept in a vase for room decoration. Some buds do not become flowers as insects would have consumed them in the bud stage.

A flower has no choice of its own.

Do we have a choice of those with whom we travel in a bus or dine at a restaurant, or attend a meeting!

In fact we can only receive friends who associate with us in our work place or a hostel or in public engagements.

The flower offers its nectar and pollens to every visitor alike.  

I have pondered over it in the recent years. Friendships are sometimes for what others can get from us, or we want from others. Both are utilitarian in function. But when friendships transcend this existential dimension and move on to a trustful mutuality, what transpires is a mutual belonging and sharing of life experiences, affirmation of each other's ways and choices in life and a sense of togetherness because of the desire to give and find delight in the prosperity of others. 

The self giving love, agape is the matrix of such relationships.

To grow into that attitude of seeing others are as the objects of our attention and thoughts would mean  coming to terms with all the experiences friendships can bring into one's life. A flower is left with what is done to it.

That is when some slip into a victim role, which is a risky path towards losing the essence of self giving! No one hurts us except ourselves. 

What others do to hurt can be redeemed just as Jospeh of the Old Testament did in his response to his brothers. His brothers sold him to Egyptians. But when a famine struck families, Joseph's brothers came to Egypt seeking food. Joseph was the one whom they had to approach as by then Joseph had ascended to be governor in Egypt. Joseph welcomed his brothers and offered them food and returned the money they paid for the grains. 

Joseph's rootedness in the nature of God was what he demonstrated. We have an all giving God and His giving has no end. 

Humans carry with them the nature of God as we are 'created in the image of God'. 

We are on this journey to become 'all things to all people'! 

The experiences of the recent years brought this message into greater sharpness and I am glad that I am awakened to this new consciousness of living the mission of friendships-self-giving! Just as a child learning to walk would get up and continue the efforts to walk, so we are to do when we slip from being in the practice of self-giving. 

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)