A plant bears its past !

I listened to a recollection of events that a friend shared, some of which were distressing at the time they occurred ! I felt moved how that person turned those difficulties, misunderstanding and humiliation into upbuilding blocks ! That person carries the past gracefully and gratefully!

Evey rose bush in our garden has the above profile as in the photo. They flower in due season and their flowers fade away. The stalk of the dried flower remains as a memory for a while till that stem grows further to bear another bud !

I listened to another person who told me of disappointments which now turn to be resources for endurance and resilience!

Most of us remember hurting or painful events for a while. They settle to stay in our subconscious level and appear as dreams metaphorically or symbolically if the events have not been processed and integrated to move forward. 

Paying attention to our dreams is one way to discern if we have processed the difficult times and received the message of hope and direction or we are yet to process to move on!

The rose flower appears in a stem which has thorns. 

To experience some difficult or distressing times is normal, but what needs attention is the recovery process. Do we recover with bitterness still lingering or with peace and comfort to move on with malice towards none and openness towards all including those who caused hurt or pain ?

The plant above is giving in habit. In that process even when it is pruned, it sprouts to give shoots, stems and flowers!

In every dispute or conflict prone situation, the attitude of giving and forgiving is the solemn experience bilaterally!

I revisit situations where there were difficulties in relationship, and send messages of confession and cordiality whenever possible, although sometimes such an act of response was delayed.  Whenever there was reciprocity, I found the relationship liberating and not burdensome!

We live with our past. We have pleasant and unpleasant experiences. Both have a formative and creative effect upon our lives! I heard a friend say once: 'Free all those you imprisoned in your thoughts' ! What a call to live freely, thoughtfully and cordially!

M.C.Mathew (text and photo)

The protective environment!

This rose bush above had many buds which blossomed one by one during one week. That fascinated me to take photographs of all buds in the garden

The following is a collection of those rose buds at different stages in different rose bushes. 

The calyx is a protective covering of sepals, which is joined together by serrated edges of sepals, which make the sepals form a shell around the growing bud.

As the petals grow and exerts pressure on the serrated ends of the sepals, they separate to give room for the bud to open to be a flower. 

It dawned on me that the calyx with sepals were needed at one stage of development of the buds. Soon the growing bud grows out of the calyx to be a flower. 

A home is such a cover of protection for children during the growing up hears. By the time children become pre-adolescent in age, they begin to move out of the protective covering of the home to become themselves. 

I wish parents would value and treasure the time till they are privileged to be protective of their children ! The best years for formative and enlarging parenting involvement is the mid childhood years. And yet I wonder if parenting receives primacy of attention as parents  consider children 'too young' to be initiated into life. 

The best period in child development to anchor children in healthy values, perspectives, beliefs, attitudes, conduct and communication is when children are between 7 and 12 years. Their cognitive processing, conscience formation, reasoning skills, behavioural adaptations, social alertness and interactive skills are at an advanced stage of formation. Their open mind, inquisitive attitude and exploratory instinct give parents an opportunity to be intimate in relationship with them to deepen their perception and interpretation.  

The children in the adolescent years are likely to break out of the 'calyx' of parenting ! 

 

It was this bud with the spittle of the Spittlebug that alerted me about the risk that a bud suffers from. The foam crated by the spittle bug is formed by the nymph, sucking plant sap and mixing it with a substance from its abdomen to create the bubbles.  The best of the bud is compromised by the nymph of Spittlebug. The flower would be subsequently reduced from its fullness of size and fragrance. 

The risk our children are exposed to during mid child are too many to list ! If they are well anchored with intimacy in communication and belonging at home, most children resist and overcome the adverse influences. 

What a delight it would be to watch a child, having reached his or her fullness in mid childhood, enters the transition of teenage years! He or she is ready for transition, protected by the earlier years of sound formation at home under the umbrella of the engaging parents!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

The lone birds!

 

At day break, I noticed the above three birds perched in unusual places in our garden and engaged in intermittent tuneful bird calls. Often they stop the bird calls when there is some movement around. They break the silence of the morning!

They are single birds. 

I have noticed that single birds are behaviourally different from those in a pair or in a family of birds. The single birds make their bird calls for the fraternity of birds. but those in pair or family of birds communicate between themselves. 

The self sufficiency mind set is what disrupts a community consciousness. 

I heard a retired person telling me that he was in a dilemma whether to buy an electric grass cutter or depend on the labourer who cuts the grass manually. He resolved the dilemma only when he realised that he was able to employ the labourer about ten days in a month. With him using an electrical lawn mower, he would displace the labourer and deny him of his livelihood. He described this struggle to be an educative process. With a loan he was able to give the labourer, the labourer bought a mechanical grass cutter. This made huge difference for the labourer. He is now able to find job about 25 days in a month!

What this retired friend went through was a tension: whether to become self sufficient or include others in his orbit of engagement. 

Now I realise how the lone birds create a fraternity spirit among the avians. The lone birds carry a message of togetherness and nearness to others!

Anna and I live in a neighbourhood where our property is surrounded by protective walls. I remember growing up in a neighbourhood where the borders of each property had some demarcation but not a boundary wall. We too built walls around our property recently. We chose posts at a distance of about 6 inches from each other so that we could avoid the look of an enclosure!

The desire for privacy displaces the fraternal feeling!

The lone birds each morning remind me, while they render their tuneful bird calls, that they share their intent to be fraternal!

It is the sense of humanity that creates within us an attitude of fraternal behaviour!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

Presence with mindfulness !

 

Both these rose bushes in our garden have a past, present and future! They reveal that in the photos above. 

It is the confluence of the past, present and the future which construct its biography. 

The rose plants bear the flowers and decorate a garden or make a flower vase colourful and fragrant. 

The rose bush might be releasing oxygen through its photosynthesis. The flowers have a short life during which time they fulfil the purpose by their presence for others. 

A lamp post is present to give light in the street!

A street sign board is present to guide travellers to their destination. 

A foot path is present on the mountain to lead the walkers to different places. 

I happened to be in a bus stand yesterday. I counted five people asking me about the direction !

It occurred to me at that time that the self-giving presence is a path finder for others!

It alerted me of yet another dimension of a mission in life!

Seeking for prosperity, professional success, wealth creation, security for future and investment to multiply wealth are the mission for many. A former chairman of the Infosys currently appears in the social media introducing a scheme he has initiated to multiply wealth. He advocated working for 17 hours in a day to grow rich in short time!

I came across a family who is involved in helping disadvantaged people to build their houses. As their children are older and are comfortable with their own resources, this couple live in austerity to help others. They were able to help substantially five families to build small houses. 

Presence for self-preservation or presence for altruistic mission !

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

 

Teaching as self-giving!

The international Teacher's day falls on 5th October, which was established in 1994 by UNESCO. Anna and I want to offer these buds and flowers to those who live the calling as a teacher !

The Parenting and Teaching are two significant formative influences upon the lives of children. 

Some teachers surprise us the way they reach to the level of students. I recall when Dr Frank Garlick, a professor of Surgery form Christian Medical College Vellore, while visiting me in 1971, chose to live in my room in the hostel, at the government Medical College hostel, Nagpur and not in a guest house. That was his way of getting to know the ambience of a hostel, dining in the hostel mess, and sharing the common facilities in hostel life! For the next three years, the conversations with friends often referred to Dr Garlick as a 'teacher who volunteered to share in the student life' !

Professor David Morley came to listen to a presentation that I was making when he needed a pair of crutches to walk after his knee replacement surgery! When I felt surprised and moved by his gesture, he responded to me by saying, ' a teacher follows the path of students' !

Professor S.S.Deshmukh, my guide during my post graduate training in Child health said to me once while examining a crying child, ' Learn to feel the cry of a child and not just hear it' !

Professor Malathi Jadhav, during her bed side rounds, would greet the parents first, then the nursing and medical colleagues before she turned to examine a child !

Professor P Zachariah often travelled to meet the alumni of Christian Medical College, which led to the formation of the Alumni Association of the Christian Medical College Vellore. He once said to me, ' A teacher has a traction towards students' !

I recollect how teachers provide us experiences which form our perspectives and optic to life! The last time Anna and I visited professor C.K.Job, when he was terminally ill, recollecting his life long association with some of his students he said, ' Students have a formative influence on the teachers' ! 

I wish the fraternity of teachers would feel honoured when their self giving transforms students. Dr Paul Henry a Neuro-surgeon told me recently that 'teachers guarded him through his learning years'!

To all teachers, let me say, the vocation of being a teacher is similar to the vocation of parenting !

M.C.Mathew (text and photo)

Forcibly displaced and dispossessed!

Two Indian Pond herons were separately perched in the coconut palm tree in our garden at day break. They were together for a while and flew off to their next flight station. 

Often Pond herons are near wet lands or near streams or ponds. To see them in ur garden was a surprise and delight!

It is when they are displaced from their natural locations, they seek  shelter else where. 

The long stretch of paddy field below our garden is now a rubber nursery. The land is dry and devoid of wet undergrowth!

I happened to read yesterday that the 111 th World Day of Migrants and Refugees was remembered on 4th and 5th September. The estimate is that 200 million people migrated in the last 25 years. One in every 35 people now lives away from their homeland. While most migration have been for better prospects and promising future, the forced migration due to civil war, famine, racial discrimination, and natural disaster is on the increase. We witness families separated and children loosing their familiar environment!

The recent loss of lives of about 60,000  people in Gaza out of which one third might be children and women, tells us a sad story. In the 80 the year of the end of Second World War and the formation of UNO, whoever thought that we would have yet another enforced migration due to territorial and racial conflict! 

I found the two Pond herons sharing their displacement ! 

I wonder whether the 149 countries voted for a separate nation of Palestine would now come forward to support Palestinians to rebuild their lives!

I wish that the displaced people from the Gaza region would feel that they are mindfully cared for at this time of their loss, grief and crisis!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

The colour in low light!

The Philippine Ground Orchids (large purple orchid) in our garden have an exquisite look in the morning especially after a rain fall. 

At twilight with the subdued light the flowers self illuminate and the pink appearance has a brilliant profile. 

It is  easier to grow them in a garden in an area, which will have some shade during the day. 

This clusters of orchids in two places in our garden have been there for  about 35 years. They self perpetuate themselves and spread out to the adjoining areas. 

I notice that ants come searching for nectar to these flowers. Honey bees or butterflies or Sunbirds do not come to gather nectar. 

How nature protects each other in ways well beyond human reasoning!

Does it not enhance our regard for creation and the mystical element it represents to us!

It is not the advocacy for carbon neutrality alone that calls us to grow plants, but to grow in appreciation for the diversity of life that we are surrounded with!

A water drop hanging on a petal of this orchid for long hours in itself is intriguing! Only when the petals are strongly moved in wind or by hand, the water drops fall to the ground. 

The orchid flower has a keeping and giving nature!

I like the call to be still that such sights bring to me!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)