Anna and I see sights of acres of rice fields ready for harvest during our travel to the college and back every day. We watched these fields from the time the fields were getting ready for transplantation of paddy and during different activities since then such as deseeding, spraying insecticides, irrigating the fields with water, etc. The transformation of the seedlings to the ready to harvest paddy plants was something that we watched with interest and curiosity.
Those four months of vigilance gives returns in plenty.
Let me use this analogy for understanding the adolescent children!
Most adolescent children I meet feel distanced from their parents, teachers and sometimes even from siblings. The parents and teachers are two intimate associates of adolescent children. If children feel less drawn towards them, I feel that the parents and teachers have not adapted well to the post modern psychology of adolescent children.
While we watch our children grow, our longing is for them to blossom, accomplish and grow up to be responsible adults with good prospects in their future.
I have recently asked a cross section of parents who have adolescent children about the way they spend time with them. They have referred to it as stressful, argumentative, and making barriers for communication.
How to make our times with our adolescent children more engaging, communicative and relational is a question which needs immediate attention!
Let me suggest that, the way forward is to be flexible, perceptive and affirming so that they receive us as those involved in their lives and choices. Our words become meaningful only if our attitudes are more authentic and welcoming. Even the correction we offer ought to be seasoned with love and patience!
The farmer is engaged in watchful vigilance for his harvest. This is a message to treasure while relating to adolescent children!
M.C.Mathew(text and photo)
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