The first bud stands alone without any reference to the plant in the photograph.
The second and third photos of buds show the plants from which the bud emerges.
I have a suspicion that some children grow up loosely associated with his or her family.
Some other children grow up truly experiencing the sense of belonging to the family!
A child is born in a family and grows up within the family!
How intimately the family relates to the child is the defining character for the wholistic development of the child !
I have a suspicion that there is a tendency to view children in terms of what a family can offer to pursue his or her education and prospects of employment later!
I come across many situations when a child does not have an affinity towards his or family due to multiple reasons!
From listening to many families I find three choices parents make which help a child to feel anchored emotionally in the family.
The choice that a family makes towards the formative years of a child in the pre-school years! A mother chose to be available for her son for three years till he was at pre-school, by taking long leave from her work. The father and mother delayed having a second child till their son was sufficiently grounded emotionally in the family.
The place and position which parents offer to a child at home in the pre-school years! I remember how a three year old girl in a home was the one who chose the menu for the week and helped her mother to cook. During the cooking time, her mother often sang nursery thymes and other songs that the girl at three years was tunefully singing and was ready to start her lessons on the key board. The girl felt wanted and valued with a role that was designated to her by her parents.
The formative experience which parents create for a pre-school child is responsible to make the attachment process intimate ! One family had a project two or three times in month in which the child was involved. What fascinated the boy was the different designs and formulations with the lego blocks, when the father and son worked together. The construction which they created remained on the chid's table for a week. The bulletin board had all the photos of the designs they had made. All the conversations associated with the planning and constructing, according to the mother was exciting because of the exploratory conversations of different ideas of their child.
The time and attention which parents offer, the active involvement of a child at home from early years and the creation of interactive process together create the rootedness in the family!
A child in the early years till about ten years is at a critical phase when his or her formative process is active and dependent on the parenting attention!
A family positioned the TV in a corner of the house and not in the main lobby or dining area! This meant that hey gave primacy of attention to conversation, interaction, playing together and doing activities which brought togetherness !
A bud in a rose bush has no life apart from the plant! Its fullness emerges from the plant.
A child is enveloped by the family and is intimately associated with the life in the family!
Let nothing come between parents and children in their formative years!
M.C.Mathew(text and photo)
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