Flowers and fruits!

It was in the first week of January 2024, I noticed that the cashew tree in our garden was beginning to flower. I noticed the first cashew nut on 12 th January and since then, the earliest cashew fruit has grown to be what it is, as seen in the last photo. 

The flowers bear the fruits at different times and the flowering of the tree continues even now. 

I watched this flowering and fruit bearing with some interest, watching this almost every day. This tree has born fruits every year for the last five years, in spite of the tree having had to be pruned almost every year, in order to allow it to grow upward instead of sideways. 

Flowering and fruit bearing complete the cycle of a tree every year. It is between January and April of every year that the fruits are normally noticed in the tree. Some visitors who came at other times of the year commented, 'This tree has not fruits'!

The waiting time for fruit, is for nine months every year. During the nine months the tree is growing to bear fruit in its season. 

An elderly gentleman who knew my parents stopped me on my way to the market, to say that his son who struggled along during the college days and became an embarrassment because of his habits and conduct, is now married and is well placed with a regular job. He was tearful when he talked about it. He used to meet my parents and share his concern, who encouraged him to be patient and be caring towards him. He recalled this incident to express gratitude to my parents for having been a support to him, when he had lost hope of his son redeeming himself from the bad company he got into. 

I noticed how a branch of a tree, in our garden,  which had to be cut as it was damaged in the wind,  is now having multiple new shoots from below. That luxurious growth from all around the stem surprised and delighted me. 

This image of the tree, overcoming its trauma was in my mind, while I was listening to the elderly gentleman, who stopped me to tell me about the recovery of his son. When probed about his childhood background, I realised that this boy lost his mother when he was three years and grew up as  a single child at home. His father being a farmer had to spend the day looking after the farm. He had to be the cook at home and look after his cattle farm as well. This boy grew up alone and was obviously lonely. No wonder he had a traction towards finding friends. Unfortunately, his friends dragged him into bad habits. 

The turning point was when a teacher in the college,  that he was studying, having noticed his skills in music, sports and creative writing encouraged him and favoured him to advance in those skills. Now as a journalist in a large firm, he is an accomplished person. 

That boy needed someone, who could accompany him through his childhood trauma and support him emotionally to find himself. 

In the story of the Prodigal son, which Jesus of Nazareth told His followers,  recorded in the gospel of Luke in the New Testament of the Bible,  there is a statement that referred to 'him coming to his senses' (Luke 15:17) which led him to return to his father after his indulgent and damaging life for a while. The delighted father on seeing his son coming, went towards him and embraced him. 

 

I realise how trauma in life is common, more so among children. They bear it without being able to express it as their feelings are amorphous and not well formed, till the post adolescent years. It is likely that the sense of loss and grief stay on till a person is helped to process them and move on with freedom and hope in his or her future. 

I come across suffering parents and grieving children!

I wish there is a formal process of enabling parents to feel for their children, when children show erratic behaviour and accompany them to  grow out of their indulgent behaviour.  

Th photo of a branch, who gave new shoots to restore its growth is a message to me, that children are born with resilience to transform themselves.

The cashew tree bears fruits in due season. It needs nine months each year to bear fruit. 

Parenting is a waiting experience. Nurturing children is an ongoing process. 

Both parents and children need accompaniment! That is a calling to which I hope some of us would respond to!

M.C.Mathew (text and photo)