A meal and the meal time!

 

The feeding behaviour of birds point to different avian patterns. The parakeets ate their food by carrying it in their paws. The Bulbuls shared the food between themselves and practiced co-feeding. In fact there were Bulbuls perched above the feeding station, waiting  for their turn. 

The parakeets took possession of the food privately for themselves. In fact, when another parakeet came nearby to share the food, there was resistance. The Bulbuls considered the food common between themselves. There were times, Barbet and squirrel came to feed at the feeding station along with the Bulbuls. 

I do not want to read too much in to this different patterns. The avians adapt to patterns that provide them space and comfort in a competitive environment, when food supply can be scarce especially during the monsoon season. 

However, it is an observation that brings an awareness about contrasting practices. 

A meal time in a home is a shared experience when the family sits around to share the meal as a convergence or symbol of shared living experiences. The meal is a meeting place for experiencing nearness and communication. The food makes the meal time a family time. 

I pondered over it recently. Preparing food consumes time and efforts. The preliminary conversations around the meal table would be about taste, flavour, texture and consistency of the food. But it soon transcends to share personal experiences. The talking and listening make the meal time an endearing time. A meal time is for heart level communication and for upbuilding each other. 

A seven years old child, while talking about happy times at home referred to meal times,  play times, story times and outings as the highlights of the day. 

He went on to add that during the meal times, his parents shared stories of childhood and growing up years. His sister who is four years is also in rapt attention, while eating food on her own. 

A story that he heard on one occasion seems to have left some impressions on him. His father mentioned about the birthday celebration in his family during his childhood. The family sent food to the neighbours to share the joyfulness of the occasion. 

Since listening to this story at five years, he celebrated his birthdays by visiting his friends in the neighbourhood and taking some food for them. I found out from his parents that he insisted on buying something small for his friends, usually a four colour pencil set. He chose to do that than have an expensive gift for himself!

A  seven years old child's mindfulness and relational perspective were formed during the meal time at home. 

This brought into focus a contrast between food and meal time. The parakeets ate food and the Bulbuls shared a meal time!

They are two different perspectives. 

The nation of Israel is on a path to ensure its safety and is altogether indifferent to the losses and deprivation of the Palestinians on account of frequent bombing. 

I remember my father planting mango saplings on the boundary of our property. When they grew and produced fruits, my father told me to gather the fallen fruits from our property and not from the road adjacent to the property. He mentioned that the fruits fallen on the road were meant for others. I look back and think of it as a way of sharing the meal and making the meal time an experience of mindfulness. 

Does my neighbour matter to me! We have a widow living next to us! Anna and I used to visit her more frequently earlier! I became aware of the lapse on our part in not being mindful enough towards her recently! It was when she came visiting to bring first fruits of mangoes from her garden, we realised our inadvertent slip!

Our lives have a shared dimension with others. Only when that is lived fully we grow beyond ourselves to be fruitful!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)