Silencing a singing child!

Children have a language of joy, hope, love and trust! As I hear this bird sing for us, I feel its language of communication and identity! Children express their identity through their affection, needs, creativity, failed attempts and even mischiefs! 

Parents normally take delight in all of these, while relating to their children. 

During the last two weeks in this part of Kerala, two children died following the abuse of children by their own family! Both of them died due to head injury inflicted on them by the family. 

Why are parents turning to be angry! 

I confess that I come across some parents who do not enjoy having children and react to their children because the children 'interfere' with their personal pursuit! I came across a press report yesterday that about 20 percent families in Kerala behave towards their children harshly and unkindly which threaten the wellness of children. It is too difficult to believe this and I am trying to varify the source. 

What ever it is I too get a sense that parents, teachers, child minders etc. who are meant to be custodians of wellness of children do seem to be becoming weary of children. I come across teachers who cannot stand the mischiefs of children. I know of parents who passively or actively abuse children. I come across policy makers who have less consciousness of the unspoken needs of children. 

A society that turns 'hostile' to children is a decaying society!

I find that there is minimal attention to adult education on parenting! 

What if all organisations organise dialogue sessions on parenting for their staff! Is it possible for churches to have parenting forum for dialogue and self directed learning! Is it possible to foster parents and care for them when they show 'at risk' behaviour towards their children! 

Children are our heritage. More than that they carry the baton we give to them into their future!

Let us ponder, 'do we give them a baton of love, affection, trust and affirmation'!

I grieve over this: since the two deaths of children due to child abuse, I have not come across a civil reaction of significance to take this as an emergency issue! 

If children suffer, and their voice or needs are subdued, it suggests that adults do not care enough!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo) 

Forty-five and afterwards !

As I watch the Christmas tree in our garden and see its twin parallel stem at the top, I cannot but recall the 'twin nation' approach the leaders of India advocated after independence in 1947. The partition of India forming Pakistan was following huge human loss in violence and migration of thousands between the two countries. However, there was some respite from violence and the two nations, India and Pakistan seemed to co-exist as neighbours with simmering discontent. 

Following the military intervention of india in the East Pakistan leading to the birth of Bangla Desh, the anger and hate towards India got expressed by terrorists activities, Kargil war and aggressive posturing between the two countries over Kashmir. Pakistan occupies some parts of Kashmir which is an Indian territory and  there is unresolved dispute over the rest of Kashmir. The status of Kashmir is different form other states in India as it was annexed to India through a separate provision in the constitution, over which Pakistan has strong discontentment.

The last two weeks witnessed one of the worst hostile engagements between Pakistan and India. A terrorist suicide bomber was responsible to kill over forty security personnel in Kashmir following which the Indian air force planes struck a terrorist camp in Pakistan. 

The political dispensation currently in India has had strained relations with Muslims in India and it spills over to the neighbour on such occasions. 

There is celebration in Indian media for the 'tit for tat'. To me any action, however justifiable it might appear rationally, which inflicts injury leading to loss of lives is less than a civilised action. Therefore it is grief and distress that come upon me.

India is fighting this battle with Pakistan over thirty years now since terrorist activities from across Pakistan caused intense damage to people and property in India. There is some evidence that this terrorist activity is with the approval of the Military and the ISI in Pakistan. 

We live in a perpetual war prone mentality in some parts of the world. The wars in Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria, etc have taken away the  lives of thousands in the last twenty years and displaced millions of people and made thousands live in refugee camps.! Do the war advocates pause to reflect the extent of misery and deprivation!

Now I sense the same war instinct creeping into the subcontinent. 

Any deliberate act to harm other humans is against the spirit of human brotherhood. 

The two stems on the top of the Christmas tree reminds me that conciliatory actions are required to live in harmony respecting the sovereignty and independence of nations. 

I feel that India has exercised restraint so far but the mood is changing to 'retaliation' as I sense the attitude of the political leadership. India has suffered and Pakistan has not chosen a peaceful means of dialogue to resolve disputes. I hope India would not resort to a condescending attitude towards Pakistan which is now almost in a financial crisis and political turmoil with its inability to control terrorism against its own people. 

I hope that global leadership would facilitate restrain and steps towards peace!

The only gift we can be to others is to carry the 'Good Samaritan' proactiveness to care. St Francis of Assissi prayed for peace, pardon and healing!

The healing between nations is an outstanding example that we need to carry as our calling. In 1981 when I went to Berlin it was a divided city with a wall between the west and East Berlin. Later in 1985 when I visited Berlin, there was only a exhibition of the wall to remind of its history. Since then Anna and I have visited Berlin almost every two years. Some of the best friends of Ashirvad Ms Giesela and late Christiana kept telling us about the tremendous healing that took place between the east and west Germany since its unification. 

The story of united Germany is a story that I want to bering to the attention of people in Pakistan and India- we are neighbours and 'let us love our neighbours as ourselves'!  

I hope we recapture the 'twin nation' vision that was in the hearts and minds in the immediate post-independent time in India and Pakistan.

The language of temperance and acceptance is what I feel would lead the neighbourly nations to the path of conciliation and peace. 

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)