Relationships in the yesteryears!

 

I took time to visit some photographs when I was getting used to using a camera about thirty years ago. Many pictures of those years were of street scenes and of children. 

One memory that returns to me is that mobile phones were not in use during those days. I wonder whether there was more meaningful social interaction and conversations at that time between young people!

I suppose lives carried a flavour of privacy and intimacy. One chose how to relate and socialise. However this has changed, where there is a craze to have lot of what one considered earlier to be private is now in the social media. 

What have we lost and what we have gained  by this 'social living', where information is flooding without relational intimacy!

I wonder whether we have lost the art of personal communication, where we trust, relate and communicate to experience a sense of belonging. The truth about ourselves is discovered by ourselves and those whom we can trust, to grow in esteem towards each other. The social relationships therefore were sacred and intimate to experience the strength of comfort and acceptance that one can receive from relationships. Friends turning foes was less common then, because the utilitarian instinct to use the other person for one's own benefit was not viewed as a honourable practice. 

What  have we gained through this social media driven behavioural culture! We 'connect' with lots more of people sharing information and communicating thoughts and opinions. We congregate ourselves into groups when ideas synchronise and thoughts converge. The social media creates opinions and defines new content and contours in behaviour. This gain is at the risk of 'relationships' which upbuild, instruct and edify! We seek people who align with our thinking and tend to create opinions that project one sided view of personal or corporate matters. 

The pictures above of children and adolescents give me another message of what prevailed about 25 years ago. The body language and communicative expressions suggest a sense of togetherness that was deeper than the current style of all that is external and superficial. 

The social harmony of those yesteryears is replaced by strong adherence to some social norms which divide us rather than unite us. 

When we loose the 'sacred' dimension to our lives we are only social beings. It is when we revere the foundation of the mystery of human life, we esteem each other regardfully and respectfully! 

Th inhibition to violate the rights of others and privacy of people was an ethos of human behaviour earlier; now the drive is to condition others to behave in a prescriptive way !

I feel drawn by a desire to cherish relationships and value friendships as mutual and contractual. The trust and affection make it happen. 

I sent messages and called on phone about thirty people recently with whom I have had some contact about thirty years ago, but less frequent now. They too are in the seventies in their age. There was a refreshing message in the response I got from most of them. I also sense that some of them carried a lonely orientation in their personal life! To be able to use social media in an upbuilding way to remain relational is possible. 

The social media has to come to stay. Can it be a means to bring nearness between people! All of us are co-pilgrims in this journey of life. We are to bring encouragement, support, caution and restrain while being co-pilgrims! I wish the sacredness inherent to our life, privacy that we cherish and honourable practice of mutuality we value would be exercised, while we use the social media for our communication!

The delight in friendships and cordial relationships brings a dimension of nearness with people! Do friendships in the 'social media age' bring people together to experience trustful and intimate relationships, which upbuild each other?

I stay with this question!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)