Words Reveal Character

 

I want to share a meditation on one of the discourses of Jesus of Nazareth, on 'Words Reveal Character', which is recorded in Matthew 12: 33-37.

33 Either make the tree good and its fruit good; or make the tree bad, and its fruit bad; for the tree is known by its fruit. 

34 You brood of vipers, how can you, being evil, speak what is good? For the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart. 

35 The good man out of his good treasure brings forth what is good; and the evil man out of his evil treasure brings forth what is evil.

36 And I say to you, that every careless word that men shall speak, they shall render account for it in the day of judgement.

37 For by your words you shall be justified and by your words you shall be condemned.

Let me present the following themes for our meditation:

                  Tree known by its fruits v33

                     Mouth speaks form heart v34

         Treasures of heart v35

          Accountability in speech v3        

     Words express Self  v37

1 Tree known by its fruits

There are nine Mango trees in our garden and only one has so far given fruits. All of them are between five and seven years since we planted them. Either they are not mature trees and have not blossomed or they have not received the full attention they need to be able to produce fruits. 

How are we to get ourselves ready to bear fruits in our lives! Let me suggest three thoughts that come to my attention from the Scripture.

a.Unselfing

Eugene H. Peterson, professor of spiritual theology at Regent College, Vancouver in his book, ‘Where Your Treasure Is–Psalms That Summon You from Self to Community’ introduces the calling for unselfing. He begins by suggesting that Americans are filled with, ‘Meism’, Me, Myself and Mine. From the notion of America as a country for all nations, in the recent times we have heard the slogan ‘America for Americans’. ‘The self is only itself, healthy and whole, when it is in relationship and the relationship is always dual, with God and with other human beings. Relationship implies mutuality, give and take, listening and responding’(p7). Paterson refers to those who pray and live as those who ‘know that life confined to the self is prison, a joy-killing, neurosis-producing, disease fomenting poison. Out of sheer sense of survival, they are committed to a way of life that is unselfed, both personally and nationally. They are in the words of their Master, ‘light’ and ‘leaven’. Light is silent and leaven is invisible. Their presence is unobtrusive, but these lives are God’s ways of illuminating and preserving civilization’ (p12).

One example of unselfing that I find in the Old Testament is the story of Abram when he went out on the journey in response to God’s call to the land God would show him. Lot accompanied Abram (Gen.13.1). There arose a strife between the herdsmen of Abram and Lot (v7). Abram turned to Lot and said: ’Please let there be no strife between you and me, not between my herdsmen and yours for we are brothers. Please separate from me. If you go to the left, I go to the right,  if you go to the right, I go to the left’(v8,9). 

In response to this proposal from Abram, ‘Lot lifted up his eyes and saw all the valley of Jordan and it was well watered everywhere- so Lot chose for him all the valley and Jordan and Lot journeyed eastward’ (v10, 11). ‘Abram settled in the land of Canaan, and Lot settled in the cities of the valley and moved tents as far as Sodom’ (v12). What amazes me is that Abram gave the choice of the land to Lot and Abram was content with what was left after Lot’s choice. 

Unselfing is the only way we can live freely without being possessed by entitlement, seniority in the workplace, position we hold, authority we carry, or decision-making role entrusted to us. St Paul referred to this: ‘Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind, let each of you, regard one another as more important than himself’ (Phil.2:3). 

To live mindfully by creating space for others is a calling that I have pursued for a while now, but only inconsistently and inadequately. In retrospect, this journey could have been more effective if I audited this process time and again. I sense the need of living unselfed even more now. It is one effective way to help people to bear fruits in their lives as unselfing becomes a way for them to follow as their calling. 

b.Entrusting

In the parable that Jesus spoke about, a man who was about to go on a journey (Mat 25:14-), entrusted his servants with five talents, two talents and one talent. Each person was given the talent proportionate to his ability. On his return, the first came to give the master ten, the second four and the one with one talent returning the one talent. The first two servants valued what was entrusted and developed their creative skills to use them and bring returns through their efforts.  

Entrusting is more than giving charity or providing livelihood. It is resourcing and capacity building. Those with potential to bear fruits, but hitherto not having had a nurturing environment, would flourish when they are entrusted with opportunities and encouragement. 

This parable is also a model of microfinancing which in the last three decades haS been a popular way of encouraging people to draw a loan from a common source for income generation and refunding the loan to cycle distribution to others. The Evangelical Social Action Forum in the state of Kerala having engaged in microfinancing for the last 25 years embarked on a banking system, ESAF Bank from 2017. Even that has been a pathfinder for many who needed assistance at affordable terms. While talking to one of the officials of the bank, she told me that, the bank exists for the weaker section of the society. The bank’s policy is to recycle its profits to offer better terms for those who need social support. 

Thinking of others who are less able is the first step in developing the practice of entrusting them with skills and resources. 

C Upbuilding

One parable of Jesus that illustrates this human development plan is the parable of the fig tree in a vineyard, narrated in Luk. 13: 6-9. The owner who came looking for fruit in the fig tree having found none told the gardener to cut the tree, because it had no fruits. But the gardener asked for one more year till he dug around it and manured it. Many among us feel reduced or disabled to bear fruits because we are in a less conducive environment or live burdened with existential challenges and are unable to be open towards others. 

Fruits are for the benefits of others. I remember the term of office of Rev Peter Miller at St Andrews Church, Egmore, Chennai in the early nineteen eighties. The St. Andrew’s church was a large congregation of middle-income families, whom Rev Miller challenged to be fruit bearing as a congregation. In six years of his presbytery, the congregation organized a day care for facility for children from the adjoining slums, service for adults with special needs, a club for those who were hearing impaired, a soup kitchen for those who lived in the streets, and a programme for differently able children. The congregation was involved in hospital visits and organized a healing service on Sunday evenings. It facilitated a Faith and Light gathering for families of children who had special needs. Some volunteers helped in conducting village medical clinics, family counselling and helping people who were substance dependent. Rev David Singh who took over from him, prepared the congregation members who were differently able for their first Holy communion. The Bishop Rt Rev Sunder Clarke, who led that service, with tears in his eyes, knelt and offered the first communion to those who were made ready to confess their faith and receive the communion.    

During that seven years, the St Andrews congregation was transformed into a fruit bearing congregation which until them was more of a self-sufficient and inward looking congregation. I remember one occasion in 1988 when, Rev miller knocked at our door one night around 8.30 pm, asking, ‘is there some food for me’! He was returning after visiting some families at Red Hills who suffered some loss during the cyclone couple of days ago. It was during that mealtime I recognised the vocation with which Rev Miller lived. Having been closely associated with the Iona community in Scotland and lived in a multiracial street in Chicago for a while, He knew that his call was to live mindful of others. He said to us, ‘Jesus did refer two commandments: Love God… and love your neighbour as yourself’.

It was Rev Miller who invited ASHIRVAD, Christian Concern for Child Care to partner with St Andrews church in 1988 to start a programme for children who were differently able. That was how the school for children, ASHA came into being, which was later shifted to a custom-made building, designed and constructed by the enthusiasm of Mr Johny Samuel, the sessions clerk of the church. That was the first partnership programme of ASHIRVAD, which gave us strength to start the ASHIRVAD projects for children at Nagpur in 1990 and the Developmental Paediatrics Unit, at the Christian Medical College, at Vellore in 1997. In fact, it was Rev Miller which led ASHIRVAD to such a call of fruit bearing beyond what we had thought of.   

Anna and I are also grateful to Rev Miler, because it was he, who instilled in us love for dogs. He gave us his dog, Dingi-Do, a Lhasa Apso breed, when they left for Scotland.  That was our first pet dog and lived with us for five years.  He would kneel during times of prayer and be still, because that was how he was trained. Rev Miller had three occasions of prayer during the day, during which time the dog joined the family prayer. There have been number of other ways that Rev Miller provided upbuilding for us during our time at Chennai, which was one major source of encouragement to us. We were new to Chennai and to the work among children with special needs, which took us to Chennai in 1983.

Let me suggest that unselfing, entrusting and upbuilding are the common ways to help people to bear fruits in their lives. 

2 Mouth speaks from the heart

‘How can you being evil speak what is good! For the mouth speaks out of which fills the heart’ (v 34).

In the book of Spirituality of Awakening Self-the sacred journey of transformation, Dr David Benner, Emeritus distinguished Professor of psychology, Richmond Graduate University, gave a vivid narration of ‘human becoming’. He referred to journey through:

Body centred Self

Mind centred Self

Soul centred Self

Spirit centred Self

Body centred Self

According to Dr Benner, ‘the body centred self is the first stage of human unfolding’. To be humans is to be embodied in our body and yet we are not just our body- Mind, Soul and Spirit. The entertainment industry and the movie world make the privacy of our body public and make a story out of it for human consumption. A teenager who came seeking help to sleep better and to reorganize her studies was preparing to be a fashion model because it would give her an identity of some significance. Some of us live suffering chronic aches and pain in our body, which more often than not is a somatization of our inner life of ups and downs. Although the body consciousness to keep our body well through diet, exercises, regular sleep patterns, etc are desirable, our lives cannot be just lived for making our body as the only expression of our identity. 

As our body is the ‘temple of the living God’, we are invited to regard our body with a sense of stewardship.

Mind Centred Self 

Descartes said, ‘Cogito ergo sum’, I think therefore I am. Our thinking skills promote prospects in science, sociology, philosophy, computer science, artificial intelligence, engineering skills, political science, etc. However, thinking egoistically creates a deceptive mind which resulted in Adolf Hitler getting possessed with an obsession for territorial conquest. The world is divided as the First world, Second world, and the Third world because that is how the economists think and view the world for easy categorization and subjugation of some nations. The thought leaders of the contemporary world have made people compassionate or fortune seekers. Late Saint Teresa or Bill and Melinda Gates would always be known for their benevolence and as examples of compassionate people. Whereas, the current president of the USA or the Chinese Premier would be seen as fortune seekers who invent ways to perpetuate themselves and exert control over others. To allow the mind to take charge of humans completely, is to disintegrate to a level of barbarian view of living ,by subjugating others to live in fear and conformity. 

Soul centred Self

Soul according to Dr Benner is a ‘reflective space between a person and events in his or her life’. Soul allows to transform events of our lives into experiences and to make meaning of all the events in our lives and around. Dr Benner suggests that: ‘Soul is a perspective to life than a substance, a viewpoint towards things, rather than anything in itself’ (P121). 

Jesus in the parable of the rich man with a good harvest expanded this thought further (Luk.12:16-21). Having had a good harvest and the existing barn not being sufficient to store the grain, he decided to build a new barn and said to himself: ’Soul, you have many goods laid up for many years to come; take ease, eat, drink and be merry’ (v19). But God said to him: ‘You fool, this very night your soul is required of you; and now who will own what you have prepared?’. The perspective of this man arose from the consciousness of this reflection of life at the soul level, where he created space for pleasure, indulgence and selfish pursuit of life. That is why Jesus in the conclusion of the parable said, ‘So is the man who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God’.

Thomas Moore in his book, A life At work-the joy of discovering what you were born to do, while referring to a ‘soulful lifestyle’ had a lot to say about the richness of it: ‘A soulful life is one of thoughtfulness, care and engagement- you are present in everything you do, not just going through the motions. You give attention to the things that matter most. You take care of your body and your health. You make your home a place of comfort, welcome, and beauty. You educate yourself, throughout life in values and ideas. Your leisure time relaxes you and  gives you rich social life and provides fun and play. Your spirituality is deep as well as visionary, and you incorporate contemplation, discussion, ritual and prayer into everyday life and you do all of this in a style that suits you as an individual. From the matrix of a rich and thoughtful life, your life emerges over time and you find ways to make it practical and workable. If you have a soulful life and home, you probably will not enjoy or tolerate a soulless workplace’ (p103).

The soul centred Self calls us down, to some details of our lives, which is a necessary growth experience all of us shall seek after as a journey station. 

The Spirit centred Self calls up and out toward that which transcends us and our circumstances of life. 

Sprit centred Self 

Let me quote form Dr Benner. The Spirit centred Self, ‘calls us to find our true home in relationship to the self-transcendent. A life aligned with this transcendent reference point allows the spirit-centred self to soar in realms unimaginably broader than anything encountered to this point. The journey of spirit helps us to transcend the particulars of our small and often cramped lives… These higher levels of awakening that saints and mystics describe are increasingly hard for us to understand apart from personal experience…The prayer of apostle Paul for the Christians in Ephesus (Eph. 3:14-19) was that they might know the love of Christ, which is beyond all knowing…Let us therefore explore the gifts of consciousness and identity that are associated with the spirit-centred self’ (p 135, 136). 

The relationship with God, who is immanent, ever present with us and transcendent, distant and far from us is the reality of those who seek to live in the spirit centred self. The psalmist in 139: 13-15 expounded this further: ‘Thou didst form my inward parts; thou didst weave me in my mother’s womb. I will give thanks to thee for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are thy works and my soul know it very well. My frame was not hidden from thee, when I was made in secret and skilfully wrought in the depths of the earth. Thine eyes have seen my unformed substance’. The Psalmist spoke a language of intimacy of knowing God and being known of God.

This integration, of knowledge of ourselves that takes place at the soul centred self-level and the awareness of an ever-present God within us that takes place at the spirit centred self-level is the true heart experience, to which all of us are called to seek after. We read in Rev.3:20, ‘Behold, I stand at the door and knock, if anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come to him and will dine with him and he with me’. This is the heart experience, God and me in communion. 

It is from this place of communion, communication can take place. What is the ambience of this communion between God and a person with the spirit centred self! It is silence. Let me quote from late Dr Henry Nouwen, a contemplative, professor of religion and psychology, retreat speaker and a spiritual director from his book, Seeds of Hope : ‘Silence is the home of word, silence gives strength and fruitfulness to the word. We can even say that words are meant to disclose the mystery of silence from which they come’ (p10).  

What fills our heart during our communion with God shall proceed as words from our mouth while speaking. The heart language is born in silence of communion and spoken mouth as words to heal, upbuild and bless. The heart language develops through the habit of Lectio Divina, meditative reading of the Bible and the practice of Centering prayer, which is prayer in silence as referred to in Mat.6:6, ‘When you pray, go into your inner room and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father who is in secret and your Father who sees in secret will repay you’.

We are to equip ourselves to speak with our mouth, with words that emerge from our hearts.

3 Treasures of Heart

The good man out of his good treasure brings forth what is good (v35). It is the same message we read in Mat 15:18, ‘The things that proceed out of the mouth come from the heart’. From within the heart, we make ourselves known to others. 

This is well illustrated in the story of Hannah, the mother of Samuel, the prophet, I Sam.1: 9-18. Hannah was one of the wives of Elkanah  and she did not have any children, while Peniannah the other wife had children. Peninnah often irritated and provoked Hannah on account of this. Although Elkanah compensated Hannah for this by his extra care and provision, Hannah longed for a son. On one occasion she was in the temple, as she was ‘greatly distressed, prayed to the Lord and wept bitterly’ (v 10). During her prayer, ‘she was speaking in her heart, only her lips were moving, but her voice was not heard’(v13). The priest Eli who was watching this went to Hannah and said, ‘How long will make yourself drunk; put away your wine from you’ (v14). Hannah in response said to him, ‘I am a woman oppressed in spirit; I have neither drunk wine, nor strong drink but I have poured out my soul before the Lord’ (15). Hannah left the temple seeking favour from God to have a son whom she had already dedicated to serve in the temple. Even amidst provocation, she turned her prayer to God, with no malice or revenge towards anyone. 

We live among people who can ridicule us, intimidate us, irritate us, speak ill of us, or cause hurt to us. It in such occasions we would truly reveal the secret thoughts hiding in our hearts, either of soberness or reactive attitude. The good treasure of our heart is prayerful and forbearing attitude. This is how apostle Peter described the attitude of Jesus during His trying time: ‘He committed no sin, nor was any deceit found in His mouth and while being reviled, He did not revile in return, while suffering He uttered no threats, but kept entrusting himself to Him who judges righteously’ (1 Pet 1:2). 

I remember hearing from Dr L.B.M. Joseph, a former director of the Christian Medical College, Vellore a painful but a moving story. He had to terminate the services of few of staff at CMC Vellore, which led to estrangement of relationships. I knew of instances when he made genuine efforts to re-establish contacts with some of them. After several years, the door was open to him a few months before his home call. He telephoned me to break this happy news with abundant joy for which he has been waiting for long. His words to me was that, ‘I have prayed for them all these years and God granted me an opportunity to embrace them. I knew that it was an occasion of celebration of forgiveness of God in our lives and between ourselves’.  

I remember how I too have had an intensely difficult time in relating to some friends in an organization where I was involved in, due to differences over matters of considerable significance. After I left the scenario, it took me about two years to send letters to renew contacts with those I had long years of association. Although the relationships have not been restored with all, I know now the pain of the stress of broken relationships and the struggles to renew them. However, seeking to renew relationship alone is the path for all those who seek to be in communion with God. The treasures of our heart reflect the inner orientation to God and to others. 

4. Accountability in Speech

‘Every careless (idle) word that men shall speak, they shall render account’ (v.36). The Greek word for idle word is aergos, ergan meaning a deed, and the prefix a, makes aergos, which means, ‘that which was not meant to produce anything’. The careless words or idle words do not create any good. William Barclay in his commentary on this passage wrote: ’Many a man is a model of charms and courtesy in public when he knows that he is watched and when he is deliberately careful about his words. While in his own house and home he or she is dreadful example of irritability, sarcasm, temper, criticism, and complaining because he thinks that he does not need to keep his guard as there is no one from outside to hear and see’ (p 52). A man or woman can say in anger things he or she would not have normally said. Had he or she been in full control of his or her words, this would not happened.

Pythagoras of Samos, a Greek philosopher once said, ‘Choose rather to fling a chance stone than to speak a chance word’. That is why it is good to pause between sentences while speaking as well as pausing to listen before hurrying to speak. When angry, stay silent for a minute, in order to reach the heart level to bring out words of ‘treasure’ hidden inside. That is why practising a language of moderation, concession and accommodation is most desirable. It is a commendable virtue, if one can redeem a difficult conversation by turning away from confrontation.  

Jesus while searching to find food to feed the five thousand men stranded in the desert, turned to Philip, ‘Where are we to buy bread that these may eat’. Philip turned that enlarging conversation (Jesus was saying this to test them, for He himself knew what He was intending to do (John. 6:6), to a limiting conversation by replying, ‘Two hundred denarii worth of bread is not sufficient for them, for every one to receive a little’ (v7). The language of the heart springs from the consciousness of the ever-present God in our spirit through His presence in Spirit. The external circumstances cannot reduce that to just a belief to be exercised when comfortable, but ought to be a reality in which we learn to ‘live, move and have our being’.

5 Words express self

For by your words, you shall be justified (v.37) 

In the alchemical language, OPUS (work) is an extension or reflection of self as the ‘raw material’ they process in the fire is a symbol of integrating the inner world of events and happenings. Let me suggest that the words which form the language is an outward expression of our inner self. Our words reveal our beliefs, values, hope, expectation, attitude, towards us, others and God.  

We might have something to learn from the Syrophoenician woman to understand about how words we speak reveal a lot about ourselves. This woman (Mark 7:24-30) was a gentile of Syrophoenician race, who came to Jesus requesting Him to cast out demon out of her daughter. Jesus in response said to her: ‘Let the children be satisfied first, for it is not good to take children’s bread and throw to dogs (v 27). The reply of the woman was most surprising: ‘Yes Lord, but even the dogs under the table feed on children’s crumbs’(v28). The Syrophoenician woman equated herself to children who were entitled to receive the crumbs and sought merciful attention from Jesus for her daughter. What else can be more illustrative of her faith in Jesus and her belief in the compassionate approach of Jesus!  When children feed from the table and dogs from under the table, both receive the same food from the provider. Her faith surpassed the expectation of Jesus, because of which Jesus sent her away commenting her for her faith and promising healing for her daughter.  

Considering that the Syrophoenician woman crossed all the social inhibition that existed at that time for a woman to approach a Rabbi and came to Jesus with unwavering faith and overcame the temptation to give up hope, because of not so welcoming initial response from Jesus, this healing story is fully centred in the personal faith of this woman. She expressed her faith in words which also revealed her heart’s longing for her daughter and her devotion to Jesus. Our words reveal ourselves. Words are human ways to offer blessings and receive blessings. The way we speak and receive what we hear would reveal the true state of our worth and depth. 

Dr Janet Goodall, a Paediatrician whom I met in 1986 in London and with whom I spent a short time watching her at work at the hospital in Stoke-On-Trent impressed me as a person who lived and worked mindful of children and families who came to visit her. She was gracious and kind in her manners and words. She served in different capacities in the National Health Service. Her colleagues knew her as a caring and compassionate doctor who felt the pain of children and identified with the experiences of children. She was one of the special friends that Anna and I are fond of because she related to us with an open heart and genuine interest in our lives. On the occasion, when she visited us at the ASHIRVAD Child Development Centre at Chennai, she encouraged us to follow the outlook, 'small is beautiful', which meant a lot to us at a time when its smallness sometimes had bothered us and others. One of her books, ‘The Shepherd is my Lord’, a personal meditation on Psalm 23, is a book which revealed her heart of devotion to God and kindness towards those whom she had known. In her early nineties, she lives with the same passion for God and love for people she had known. Dr Goodall had a special contribution to make to the members of the Christian Medical Fellowship, U.K and International Christin Medical and Dental Association. As a speaker, writer and  companion to those who sought her pastoral support, she has been a blessing and inspiration. To me her life is, a testimony to the truth: ’words reveal character’. 

  M.C.Mathew (text and photo)

Paintings from the internet with grateful acknowledgements.