Flight, freeze or Fight!

 

The sequence of the body language of this pair of Indian Pied Myna in a village in north India caught my attention. 

I heard them in distressing behaviour of loud and frequent bird calls, both birds equally looking disturbed or distressed. There were two large birds high up in the air! Was it a fearful reaction to their presence!

I waited at the scene to observe the behaviour of this pair of birds, after the larger birds flew away from the vicinity. The birds took about fifteen minutes to settle down with composure and presence to the immediate surroundings. 

Some birds while being threatened by predators fly away to hide, and some others feel frozen and send out distress calls. The friendly birds from other species would join them to give them protection. A third behaviour is responsive behaviour. The small birds are faster and agile and therefore can resist the slower predators. 

I thought the birds represent human behaviour, when we are in distress: flight, freeze or fight!

The flight response was evident when, a year long ethnic strife started in Manipur. One community left the scene and relocated themselves in other places outside the state. Those who left were unable to return as their houses were destroyed. 

Those who froze in fear had no alternative but to stay on. They too had to endure repeated threats and attacks and some stories of those who were helpless are too disturbing to recall. One wonders if people feel so strongly about their ethnic identity that they practice it without being mindful of the suffering they impose on others. 

A third group in Manipur stayed on to fight and the conflict is raging even now. The local government and the national movement seem to be cold and indifferent, that the conflict is perpetuated by vested interest of some people, it is alleged, to have the hills free of human habitation to start the mining operations, where the subsoil is mineral rich. Their steadfastness to preserve life and environment is drawing the civil society to take note of the wisdom of their approach for the future prospects for the state of Manipur. They are valiant and are overcomes, even when they suffer their personal loss. 

I came across this behaviour in families when they had to consider special support for developmentally challenged children. Many parents  who withdrew, sometimes only one parent, seemed to slip into a depressive orientation and stayed delinked from normal events in life. Those who froze and prolonged their adjustment process invited more stress upon themselves and the family life. Those who were ready to engage the situation, although had to face changes and transitions,  brought benefits to themselves by growing in resilience and creative responses. 

To fight in such situations is to overcome an adverse situation by looking at the alternative pathways of being, becoming and belonging. A family, whose three year old son developed weakness of one side of body following an acute neurological illness, believed that he could recover to a large extent with an exercise regimen. They introduced him to swimming, which the boy was fond of, and now at six years, he is fully functional on the side which was weaker. The family had to take him to swimming three times a week, which was a distance away form their home and was expensive. Meeting the family recently gave me an impression of the enormous fulfilment that the child and parents have for stretching themselves to 'fight to overcome' a challenge!

Let me suggest that the 'fight' ought not to be directed towards others, but towards oneself, to draw strength from the resilient spirit within and the hope that sustains us.

A neighbour family lost the mother; her son who was a support to her in rearing cows took a break from his sports to give more time outside his school hours, to attend to the  domestic needs. His father restricted his work time to be more at home. While talking to the boy, who brings us fresh milk every day, told me 'he wanted to honour his mother by giving his bit to support the family'. I am sure he misses his athletic practices and other sports. But he decided to fight to overcome!

I noticed how the birds above decided to fight the threat by loud bird calls, calling for help from friendly birds. 

The flight or being frozen are not the options. To be present to the situation to engage,  shall make the environment  easier to overcome!

M.C.Mathew (text and photo)