For Frank, family mattered and he gave his attention to build cordial and communicating relationships with Val and his children! Frank and Val took a keen interest in the formative process of their children during their transition times. I remember occasions when both Frank and Val made deliberate choices in favour of offering their care, attention and availability to their children. Val stepping back from pursuing a full clinical career was one example of this.
During one of my visits I watched how engaging Frank was with their grandchildren. The three photos of him in a playful mood with one of the grandchildren gave me an insight of, how he related to the grandchildren spontaneously and effortlessly. Frank and Val were close companions to some of their grandchildren during the different phases of their life.
The photo of Frank watering the garden became symbol to me of his willingness to engage in the different chores at home. He lived thoughtfully.
When we had a get together with Ms. Margaret Parkinson, a common friend whom Val and Frank knew from the time they were in India as partners of the BMMF, I loved listening to the names and stories of people whom they recalled cheerfully. Val and Frank offered a large space for friends in their thoughts and involvements. I remember once attending the Sunday worship service with them in their church, during which time, the way others related to them, testified to the friendly and upbuilding way they related to others. Frank had maintained notes on people whom the wanted to recollect. He carried them in his thoughts.
His hand written Christmas and new year greetings sent to us and others was an expression of his desire to stay in touch.
Frank functioned from the orbit formed by his family and friends!
Anna and I received abundance of their thoughtfulness during the last fifty years.
Now we remember Val who made his life rich and colourful! We carry her in our thoughts during the early days of Frank's absence physically!
Anna and M C Mathew (text and photo)
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