The light within

Anna and I completed one week of our time in this village to which we have moved, to stay with my mother. We live in a cottage, the old portion of which is 80 years old and the renovated portion in the front is 40 years old. It is both our home and storehouse now. For the last one week, a hosts of workers and ourselves were making an effort to make this home livable for us. With space being a big constraint, we are learning to adjust with what is possible.

A question surfaced  in my mind today. What is the light within me like now! It caused me to pause to tune to my feelings and thoughts since we arrived here. There is a calm assurance about the rightness to have relocated here. Anna feels more strongly than I do now. There are different people who are trying to welcome us and make our adjustment easier. There are irritations such as when the autorikshaw driver refused to carry me home after shopping, as he claimed that he did not know me enough. It was dusk and I could not find another one till much later. There are power interruptions several times in a day- toady there were five times till now. There were three breakdowns of mechanized kitchenware, which are not repaired even after one week, in spite of several reminders to the service agencies.

Amidst these mixed experiences, this candle brought back home a truth that is central to our lives. Jesus of Nazareth said, 'if the light within you is darkness, how great will that darkness be'! If anxiety, anger, reactions or blaming were to occupy the centre of my life, it will create an intense darkness within me. Instead, if I can protect the light of hope, patience, acceptance and hospitality from being extinguished, it shall lead me on. It is not the 'night' that I fear, but whether the light within me will keep burning even if it can only be a dim light for the time being! 

I am responsible for this choice. God is the enabler to help me in making that choice and staying with  me to fulfill my choice.  

A domestic helper told me today, 'You returned to your childhood by coming back here'. It revived my spirit, because. all new beginnings start by 'returning.. ' because, the old testament prophet Isaiah says, in doing so you shall find  'your salvation'( freedom) .    

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)