Art forms in nature!

Anna and I noticed these visually captivating art forms in nature! They looked spectacular to us each in its own way!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

Light and shadow!

During a walk in the evening the other day, I noticed how tree trunks had a colourful look with sunlight and shadows. Th fourth photo of the twilight falling on the trunk of another tree and the fifth photo of a tree trunk looking dull after sunset captured my attention. 

The sun gives light and the light casts shadows when the light is obstructed.  The foliage of the tree was what obstructed the light from reaching the trunk to cover it in brightness. 

The light can be dazzling, which is why protection from sunlight might be needed. During summer months in the tropics, people are advised to protect themselves from direct sunlight during the mid day to prevent heat stroke.  

Ir occurred to me that shadow can carry two metaphors. 

The first is that, shadow is protective. The saplings we plant would need protection from sun till they take roots and new shoots come up. Children grow up in the shadow of their parents. They are protected physically, emotionally, and socially till they are older and are able to make choice and participate in life's journey. What is a shadow that parents offer to children! It is caring, conversing, engaging, supporting, educating, providing, etc. This process contributes to childhood formation, which enables them to become independent, functional and grow into maturity! Being a shadow for children is a sign of the value we offer to children and to their future ate become endowed with wisdom and virtue. 

The second metaphor of shadow is darkness which hides visibility. A good part of the trunk was not visible as darkness concealed many portions of the trunk. It is this thought that brought some anxiety in my mind. If we were to live our lives concealed and hidden from others, the risk is dichotomy. We appear outwardly different from what we truly are, as we hide our lives to remain opaque. This dichotomy of inconsistency between our true self and concealed self is the common reason for mistrust and conflict between people. And yet, many people like to live inflated lives to impress, disproportionate to the reality inside. 

When I look at the function of parents being a shadow for their children, I find this slipping

away. Parents have too many preoccupations. Children and primacy of attention for their formation is slipping away from the primary agenda of parents. I feel this as an alarm signal. 

I find that many people feel comfortable to live double lives. They no longer feel restrained from being dichotomous as moral values and spiritual orientation are not at the centre of family lives or at work place. 

I came back from the evening walk, receiving a message about the metaphor of shadow. I need  this consciousness to enlarge within me as I find the pressures of circumstances too heavy to live responsibly. 

To be an advocate for parents to choose to be a shadow for children for their personal formation and to seek to live transparently as much as possible and be confessional when there is a slip, came upon me with a new appeal today!

Trees speak! I felt it again today!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

 

Watch birds to learn a habit!

I feel amused and surprised by the way this bird finds its feed. This bird is like a specialist gymnast displaying its balancing skills on twigs to fetch nectar. 

Its perseverance is worth takin in ! 

Giving up is not in its agenda!

I carry this message for myself! 

I succumbed to the easy option of giving up on some occasions. 

I have something to learn from the  Avian School of Perseverance !

They are purposeful and determined. One can condition oneself to be perseverant and consistent!

It is effort and willingness to persevere which might bring favour, God being the enabler and grace giver!

M.C.Mathew (text and photo)

 

Hibiscus in brilliant colours!

 Flowers usually hold our attention for various reasons. 

Today, it was because of the brillaint colours of the Hibiscus flowers. 

They were larger than the usual size and appeared like a lamp in a plant!

What a sight to behold and feel touched by the soothing colours!

Wordsworth wrote about Daffodils. I wish someone would make a poem to adore the Hibiscus flowers! The way the petals move gently in the wind while the branch below sway, they appeared to be dancing in the wind!

M.C.Mathew (text and photo)

Five pigeons- different species

I do not remember finding such a collection of different Pigeons on one day during a walk! To me it was exceptional expereince!

The fourth photograph of a crested Pigeon is my first time collection. 

The colour complexion, elegant look, and exquisite movement style are their outstanding features. 

One place I saw hundreds of Pigeons at one time, in the morning and evening times, was in Trafalgar Square in London. It was a sight worth seeing again and again. That impression of the pigeons allowing to be held by visitors gave me a first hand experience about the comfort level of pigeons living and breeding near human habitations. 

Among the avians, Pigeons receive the distinction of being intelligent enough to carry letters between their beaks from one place to another.  

A military officer told me once that during the Second World war some countries had special pigeon squad for communicating urgent message of war secrets to the front line soldiers. 

I found sighting five different species on a single day, something special to remember!

 M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

Feeling for others!

I stopped to look up while on the morning walk, when I heard long bird calls just above me. One bird was moving between the flowers, while gustily calling forth!

 Soon another bird arrived and they located around a cluster of flowers. One of them continued the bird call, while in between both of them feeding on the nectar. 

A third bird arrived in a few minutes. Thais when I got a sense of the repeated bird calls. It was meant for other birds in the morning to come for nectar. Those bird calls were therefore friendly calls to to draw other birds to the site. 

The three of them took turns to feed on the nectar. Then two of them left one after the other and one was still left in the site, when I walked on. 

Birds have their way of sharing what they found with other birds although the opposite is also prevalent. 

Some of the sights in nature are truly instructional and formative. 

The two parables that Jesus of Nazareth spoke came to my mind while walking back home. 

The parable of the prodigal son brought into focus about his indulgent life which exhausted him of all that he forcibly took away from his father. On return of the son, to meet his father seeking forgiveness, we find the grumbling attitude of the his brother about the party that his father arranged to celebrate the return of his son.  The prodigal son had a greedy attitude and his brother had a possessive attitude. They lived in the same home but got consumed by their selfish passions. 

In the story of the Good Samaritan, Jesus of Nazareth brought forth the humane side of a man who took notice of a wounded person lying on the road side and attended to look after him. He behaved dissimilar to the the two earlier passers by, who ignored the wounded person. 

We live in a season and time when these two contrasting features in human behaviour is noticeable where ever people can be found. 

I have memories of instances when I turned the other way when someone needed help and attention. 

That instinct is deep within. It was this consciousness which brought my attention to the bird behaviour, of  birds calling out for other birds to come and share in what they found!

To share or give is superficially seen to be losing one's chance; instead, when we give we move towards our true humanness, with which we are born!

When I was growing up, I noticed my mother keeping away a handful of rice into a separate container every time she cooked rice at home. She took that to the Church once every month and gave to the pool of rice for distribution.   Many families did this to share food with people in the neighbourhood who lived in poverty! 

That habit regularly practiced then, is nor more a practice now. The message from that form of giving was a regular reminder in every home about people who lived in need!

The birds that I referred to above, were messengers of a truth about sharing, lest I forget others when every thing is well with me!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

 

The Bird language!

I noticed a pair of Noisy Miner on a cable. The male was singing and its partner was listening. The bird songs are for various reasons. 

One of them is to entice its pair for courtship. 

One response this bird song generates in the other pair is intense attentiveness. Some female birds choose to be a pair depending on how much the bird song of the male was tuneful and sensual. The singing bird modulates and varies the bird songs, corresponding to the response of the listening female bird. 

I like this rhythm- singing and listening!

I find its parallel in infants when the mother sings to her infant. Often infants from four months of age can listen to mother's voice and get familiar with the tunes and words of the song. Some infants follow the facial movements and actions which might be accompanying the songs. 

The same is not true when an infant is made to listen to songs from a visual media. As the familiar face of the mother does not exist in the screen, most infants get used to the tunes without associating them socially and interactively. The visual association with the source of sounds and facial and lip movements are essential to create language appreciation in an infant. 

When an infant hears the mother sing, it is often associated with the mother stroking the infant and express emotionally by hugging, holding the baby close to her chest, etc. These multiple sensory and emotional initiatives of the mother make an infant feel attached to the mother. Every time an infant makes gestures of responses it is reciprocated which is how the turn taking process gets initiated in early infant behaviour. 

The bird song is a  language of intimacy.

The mothers's voice is correspondingly a language of intimacy to which an infant is drawn, which is the first step for the infant to develop attachment behaviour. It is this behaviour which helps the infant to feel consoled and comforted, while being with the mother. There is even a speculation that the high pitch tone of a lady's voice is better appreciated by an infant when compared to the low pitched voice of a man. 

I feel that this human interface between a mother and an infant promotes communicative intent in an infant. 

An infant's behaviour of cooing, making turn taking sounds and jargons before sounds which are similar to the sounds of words are produced, is foundational to the language sequences in an infant. For this to happen, the mother is the primary initiator of the communication intent!

The bird songs are mostly for relational development!

Interaction between an infant and his or her parents is also for relational development!

The attachment behaviour which is a social and emotional bonding between an infant and his or her parents is the beginning of all relationships to emerge!

Similarly,  listening attentively and responding warmly create the ambience for adults to feel related to each other at home, work place and in social setting! It is then words become meaningful; speaking brings edification to others, and conversation becomes communication of hearts in acceptance and affirmation!

All of us long to live in the experience where we share the language of heart, with each other which is love, forbearance and mutuality!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

 

The Giver and the Receiver !

 The flowers give nectar and the honey Bees receive it!

This equation between the giver and the receiver is something I have watched with interest. 

The flower is rewarded for its honey by the Bee pollinating the flower. 

This reciprocity is worth pondering upon!

The receiver gives something back to the flower to complete its cycle. 

It is when we give, we open the door to receive!

Giving prompts the receiver to give something in return. 

Giving and receiving become the reciprocal human behaviour. 

A child of three years reminded me of the virtue of giving and the response it creates to generate a chain reaction. This child gave me a flower; another child seeing this gave one to his mother. Both children then gathered flowers from the ground and gave a handful to all the adults around. All the adults, strangers to each other, greeted each other and exchanged pleasantries. 

Giving is a graceful act. Receiving is a grateful act. Giving and receiving bring nearness between people. 

When we withhold giving, we reduce the chance of receiving!  

Giving is a way of blessing others! 

A friend told me that he decided to support a child for schooling. The child's father who spent part of his income drinking alcohol, seeing this kind gesture of a stranger came to thank him. This act of kindness touched this father that he stopped drinking. He subsequently tried to support another family,  who too suffered because of alcohol dependance of the father. In three months he too kicked the habit. 

Let me suggest that giving might not create such substantial changes; but giving opens the door for changes that can be significant. 

Most people feel touched when given something!

Giving is a way of touching the life of others! 

When I receive a greeting with a smile, I feel revived from my thoughts within to be outward in thought and deed!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

Planting and sowing !

During my walk, I found this orange bush in the centre of the garden in front of a house, yielding many fruits. 

A garden is the home for flower and fruit bearing plants.

They become their purpose by receiving all that it needs form the soil and air. 

From the experience that Anna and I have had in developing green patches in front of our houses in four different places over the last thirty years, we have come to believe that plants too face adversities of all sorts. We have lost some plants for reasons not known to us. Only when they show signs of withering and later dry up, we sense that they ceased to grow. Rarely we have been able to save plants, who showed early signs of loosing their lustre. 

The wise person who wrote the book of Ecclesiastes in the Bible, had something insightful to say about sowing and planting. 'Sow your seed in the  morning, and do not be idle in the evening, for you do not know whether morning or evening sowing will succeed or whether both of them alike will be good' (Eccl.11:6).

I am coming closer to step back from fifty years of my professional involvement, out of which forty years have been with families who have had neuro-developmentally challenged children.  Parents come with different levels of openness and receptive attitude. A good number of them were in the cycle of grief, which made it difficult for them to shift their focus from their loss to view the prospects of their child. 

I have had this dilemma in the early years of my professional involvement with such parents. How much to invest in them, when their readiness to receive was yet to come. The slogan, 'stay with those who stay, walk with those who walk and run with those who run' came out of our consciousness of the different stages of readiness of families. 

A family, whose child did exceptionally well, inspite of the special needs and is now well known for the different abilities and performing skills, sent a message and summary of child's achievements a few days ago. Reading through the array of achievements and the international acclaim this young adult and family received, I looked back at the several contacts we have had with the family from six months till the early school years of this child. Then the family moved on to live and work overseas. That family was ready to run exploring opportunities and avenues for their child. They took their child to a life of abundance of opportunities.

As against this child, I know of another family, whose child is in a similar age now, grew up  with many developmental prospects, but number of co-morbidities and adverse domestic circumstances limited the child to access all opportunities. This child needs medical attention to modify the behaviour, sleep dysfunction, mood disorder and episodic outbursts of anxious reactions. This family was struggling all along and I feel good that we were able to keep pace with them to some extent. Often the family needed support as much as the child. Their motivation and availability did not impress me, inspite of a second mile attitude towards them. They almost chose to stay and preferred to feel frozen. 

Between these two ends of the spectrum, one family ready to run after opportunities and another family only able to stay, there were many other families who were ready to walk! One such family whom I got to know, who were steadfastly focussed on supporting their child with multiple developmental needs, although financially limited, changed the prospects of their child. All that they could afford to give the child was an opportunity to study in a state school, but in an ambience having been well cared by the mindful teachers. This child is making progress in communication and cognitive skills. The state supported developmental therapy is available to the child at school. What made the child make progress was parental readiness and consistency to believe in the developmental prospects of their child. 

The parental readiness had these three styles- outgoing readiness, supportive, and staying frozen! 

It is in to such a spectrum of receptivity, we are called to sow and plant. 

As I prepare to draw to a close my professional involvements, I have a sense of gladness for having been in this speciality of Child Development. It brought me close to a section of  parents who live reduced lives because of the limitations in their children to fulfil the parental aspirations. The children too have a life long struggles, as some clinical conditions are not fully responsive to treatment or therapy. 

I have had my moody moments, when I felt that I was walking through the valley experiences of discomfort and disappointments. This specialty of child development brought me face to face with diversity of medical conditions which made children suffer from limitations and pushed families to a languishing journey. 

That is why I feel drawn by symbols like this small orange bush with several oranges. Life is not just an encounter with disappointments but a celebration of abundance of gifts of love and given opportunities to work by serving! 

When one sows and plants in the morning and evening, the prospects of fruits are likely to be more. 

 

So I find strength in what I found as a message of hope: 'Just as you do not know the path of the wind and how bones are formed in the womb of the pregnant woman, so you do not know the activity of God who makes all things (Eccles.11:5).

Life is colourful ! The optic to view life is through a mystical perspective!

M.C.Mathew (text and photo0