Friendship is our identity!

 

I was watching this wish bone plant with its fresh flowers in our garden, following the recent rainy season. Just above the plant in the nutmeg tree, a Bulbul was perched looking around! 

I noticed another Bulbul in the cable facing the feeding table. 

I noticed both of them flying to be perched on the the steel frame of the kennel yard at a distance, yet looking at each other in a beholding manner!

They moved together the feeding table and shared the meal from the same bowl and moved to be perched in another cable in the garden and later on under the foliage of an adjacent tree! They were together in a communicative mood while perched in a branch on the top of a tree!

The courtship for birds begins with friendship!

Our garden is a place where birds meet and move to different levels of social formation!

The language of harmony and intimacy emerges through such relational behaviour!

While we talk about fractured relationships in our homes and society, I feel encouraged what birds communicate in their orientation!

I want to believe that each person would receive an environment of warm and affirming regards !

We become ourselves through what we receive and give to others!

On the 79th Independence Day of the Republic of India, I long to experience friendship as the language of heart between people! 

  

M.C.Mathew (text and photo)

The Enablers !

I keep looking out to observe the way rose flowers behave during the recent spell of heavy rain. All of them as in the above photo started with well formed buds looking healthy and elegant. 

The rose flowers in the above photographs seemed to remain bright, colourful and upright. 

The flowers in the photos below had a different appearance. The rain spell seemed to have made them different in appearance, drooping and drenched!

 This story of rose flowers in our garden, most of them looking well enough and some looking weary made me think about life of people in our society. 

The contrast is evident. Some live opulently, some overcoming and some under the burden of living!

Is not most of what we encounter in our communities associated with irresponsible or insensitive human behaviour! 

For about twenty years, the global slogan in the environmental domain was to reduce carbon emissions and resort to use of renewable energy. The current president of the United States of America opposed this and pulled out of the Paris consortium of countries who committed to reduce pollution. He seems to forcibly explore and drill fossil oil !

The warning from public health watchers and experts in non-communicable diseases go unnoticed! 

Would hundreds die in Gaza if the Israeli government was mindful of the Palestinians? The children and adults dying of starvation is an imposed cruelty upon people by those who stopped feeling for those who are hurting!

The pictures above tell that there is resilience sufficient enough to withstand hardships. 

But just as some flowers suffer beyond what they can endure, so it is with humans when faced with adversities in life!

The well to do can be more mindful of those who suffer! 

They are the Enablers !

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

Diffusing fear !

Waiting for the feeding turn!

The Barbets and squirrels are not friendly enough towards the Bulbuls. 

The Barbets wait at the water bath and after a vigilant search of any threat around move to the feeding table!

It was only after noticing this pattern a few times, I got a sense of the anxiety state some birds carry with them!

I heard how a highly accomplished professional is weary of driving! There is no history of accidents or unpleasant experiences on road. He drives carefully and efficiently. He decided to take some help to overcome the inhibition or fear that he carries. He discovered during a structured debriefing that he fed his thoughts with news of accidents, which then occupied his inner ambience. Two month later, after he found ways to demystify his fear he found a new enthusiasm to drive! 

I do come across Bulbuls who co-feed with Barbets. Although the body language of both of the birds above is indicative of some discomfort, I watched both of them feed from the same feeding bowl! 

Fear  is mostly imaginary ! Each person can adapt to situations of  fear and anxiety without being overcome by them!

The above photo tells us that the avians do overcome fear or anxiety to a good extent! That in itself is a step forward in fraternal view of each other!

To be fraternal is to be fully relational in behaviour!

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

The Oral movements of a Bulbul !

The ritual of most Bulbuls at the feeding table is to engage in bird calls before starting to feed. 

One pattern of the bird calls is short and repetitive as in the first photo. The sound is pleasant to hear and is well modulated with varying pitch. 

A second pattern is long and loud bird calls. During this the tongue between its beaks, stays almost parallel to the floor of the mouth. The  long bird calls are loud and monotonic intended to convey some message to the bird fraternity. 

The feeding pictures above give yet another introduction to the  physiology of the feeding process. The mouth is open as the bird approached the food. It bends the neck and back to stretch towards the feeding bowl. The food is picked up between the beaks and transferred to the floor of the mouth. The thrusting movement of the tongue allows the food to be swallowed. There is a pause between each feeding cycle. 

As I watch the Bulbuls, I realise that they are friendly birds and are comfortable to pause for the camera. 

The routines and patterns of birds tell us a lot about the orderly and mindful behaviour of birds! 

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

Life, Living , Learning - 19

A juvenile Magpie Robin moved between bushes in our garden yesterday, taking short flights. Its feather complexion did suggest that it was a juvenile bird. 

I remember watching juvenile Barbets and Bulbuls accompanied by both parents or one of them in the feeding table. The parent bird often fed the juvenile bird. 

What was a contrast with the juvenile Magpie Robin was its own feeding effort. It did find a worm in the grass. 

Thanks to its parent birds, the juvenile Magpie Robin was already a finder!

This transition from receiving to finding is an important change in the  behaviour of juvenile birds. They become independent from then on. 

Birds use a nest only during a breeding season. They make trees, bushes or grass their shelter, sometimes changing the place depending on the climate and feeding needs. 

The birds highlight the habit of transitoriness !

That is a message which is alien to humans in the current state of civilisation. The human instinct is to live as if what matters is longevity or permanence. 

The current pursuit to 'prolong life' and overcome the ageing process makes a strong appeal to follow life style modifications to live longer! 

I sense that even that pursuit adds to stress!

The 'Happiness index' that is often quoted as a mark of wellness is low even among those who practice life style modification practices. 

I wish the shift would occur toward 'contentment'  while living !

The shift from acquiring more to being content with what is necessary is an orientation that some choose!

A consultant talked about the professor under whom he currently works, as one who uses a 20 year old car, and lives moderately, who conveys no greed or acquisitive passion. He lives soberly and mindfully! He seems to have 'lots of space' for others in his thoughts and attitude. He foresees the abilities of his younger colleagues and bestows upon them a readiness journey to live content !

To live contently is in itself a vocation !

M.C.Mathew(text and photo)

Knowing your child - 25

The morning scene in our garden yesterday, was similar to the routines of the mornings, when the birds gather in the flight stations. A red vented Bulbul, a Tailor bird, a squirrel, and a pair of red whiskered Bulbuls were perched in two adjacent trees. A red whiskered Bulbul was at the feeding table, waiting to feed!

That is when a surprise below caught my attention. The Cedar Bay Cherry tree had raw berries in their blossoms, which would turn to dark grey when ripe. Now the berries were green and raw.

The red vented Bulbul moved through the foliage of the tree consuming the raw berries!

The red vented Bulbul stayed perched in the adjacent tree after this feeding expedition, content and ready to fly away. 

A red vented Bulbul behaved differently from the other birds, who too are fond of berries. It did not mind if the berry was not ripe or succulent. 

The odd behaviour or a behaviour different from the expected or what is commonly observed often raises eye brows when parents observe it in  their children. 

A mother observed that a three year old child often picked up leaves from the ground and had a large collection of them. For the mother it was an aberrant behaviour. It was when the child got an art book and colouring pencil set for his birthday, the parents felt surprised by what he did. He tried reproducing the size, shape and colour of the leaves he had gathered in the art book! He filled all the twenty pages of the art book to the surprise of all. He had an album of leaves at the age of three years. For parents, it became the gateway to discover more creative abilities in their son. 

What appears different might not be an aberration or odd behaviour! 

I wish parents view what they see in the behaviour of their pre-school children as an occasion to be more observant of their child to discern the hidden treasures in a child! This calls for patience and openness to observe the behaviour through the optic of the mystery that remains hidden in a pre-school child. 

I remember a mother recalling how her five year daughter could bake a cake all by herself and decorate it for her younger brother's birthday party!

The red vented Bulbul broke the avian tradition of waiting for the fruits to ripen! I have a suspicion that the bird was juvenile and was therefore less experienced in finding a feed. 

A home is a place for children to be themselves ! A child is a mystery and every child becomes a delight as much as parents can celebrate the unfolding of the person!

When children have some special needs, even that becomes an opportunity to enable them to become what they can be!

A child is larger than our first impressions!

M.C.Mathew (text and photo)