There is a growth trajectory in the plant life. This is expressed by the cycle of the old replaced by the new. The flowers live and fade away. The new life springs forth. The plant itself grows and the new flowers are a sign of that growth. In that journey path, the old gives way to the new. The new springs from the continuum of the old with adaptations and changes needed, to blossom in different weather conditions.
Richard Rohr, in his book, Falling Upward, A spirituality for the two halves of life, wrote in the introduction (p xv): " Life, if we are honest about it, is made up of many failings and fallings, amidst all of our hopeful growing and achieving. Those failings and fallings must be there for a purpose, a purpose that neither culture nor church has fully understood. Most of us find all failure bewildering, but it does not have to be. My observations tell me, that if we can clarify the common sequencing, staging, and direction of life's arc bit more, many practical questions and dilemmas will be resolved. That does not mean we can avoid the journey itself. Each of us still has to walk it for ourselves before we get the big picture of human life". There is a clarifying note in his proposal of moving upward by falling in page xxv; " Like skaters we move forward by actually moving from side to side..." I
I felt spoken to when the author referred to the first half of life as the time to create a 'container' for the 'content' of the second half of life to inhabit the container. Many stay attending to the container, pursuing after to what 'we shall eat, put on and where to live' and do not enter into the mystery of experiences of life of second half of life. (p1). Erick Erickson while proposing the eight stages of psycho-social formation of life, suggested the mid life from 40 to 65 years to be a season of generativity, where people grow up to leave behind a pathway for the future generations.
This process of becoming our being, our true self, is the essence of the journey of the second half or the season of the mid life!
It is now 13 years since Anna and I live in our cottage surrounded by a flourishing garden. For a long stretch of time during summer and rainy seasons, the plants live with foliage and from winter time onwards the flowers and fruits appear till the height of summer. The plant life appears incomplete if the foliage alone was their identity. The flowers and fruits bring another revelation of their content !
I happened to go to five shops to make enquiries about buying replacement tires for the car. The four shop keepers talked all about the tire and impressed upon me their offer. They were ready to replace the tires instantly. I felt a pressure to yield to their proposal. But one shop keeper wanted to know the kilometres the car would run every month, terrains of travel, speed at which I drive, duration of the rest time I offer to the tire during a long distance travel, the frequency of checking the tire pressure and refilling with nitrogen, wheel balancing and inspection by a tire technologist. I felt surprised by his orientation in his business practice. His attention was on the buyer and did not seem to be driven to sell. It was then he introduced three options of brands of tire and detailed me on the pros and cons of each brand. He talked about the cost only when I enquired about it. Fascinated by his interest in the other without leaning to a one sided to sell tire, I asked about his background. He is a person, who sees those coming to his shop not as customers but as fellow human beings. That suggested that he was on his second half of life living with a longing for human relationships. He had a transcendent view of life beyond business transactions. That gentleman won my heart as a one engaged in becoming his being !
Life's mission is becoming our being !
The inflorescence in the banana above became a fully grown banana bunch, growing ready to ripen over period ! I remember watching the stages of the growing and changing process during the last four months. The banana becomes an offering to the farmer who nurtures its growing process. Its being from being a plant to bear fruit was its natural destiny !
Becoming our being, our true self is our journey path!
M.C.Mathew (text and photo)
